This article was written on 02 Aug 2005, and is filled under Fahrradtourberichte aus..., Montpellier.

Questioning myself.

Who are we to go on a trip like this? Each day is a fight, each day needs special preperation and improvisation. Where to go, what to do? Where to buy food, where to eat it and, at last, where to sleep secure?

We have only ourselves for entertaining. All the people we meet are for one night, one evening. We are together all the days.

Why don’t the people write? My mailbox was almost empty, just two new mails since Figueres. And I wanted to go a bit earlier to an internet cafe.

It was a lot of power that you people could give me, just by writing a comment here, a short mail.
I don’t know. One week has passed. No way back right now, close to anything we want.

Maybe we don’t go to Marseille so I won’t be able to see the Mediterranean again. It’s a pity. Or not so I have to come back? I don’t know.

I don’t feel bored of this trip, but I feel a bit tired. My body is tired, my mind is tired and nothing can wake me up.

Even the most simple things for all the people out there become some kind of an adventure: finding a toilet in the morning, finding fresh water to drink for the day, finding the way that doesn’t exhaust you too much. It’s all about improvising all the times, nothing is sure, only the moment exists.

The wind is not our friend, the mountains neither. I will love to see the flat environment in Belgium and the Netherlands. Or maybe it’s another wrong thought of mine as I also thought the south of France will be flat. Or as I didn’t inform myself about the conditions in Catalunya.

I’m sure, I need a shower, for example. Something simple. To drink something cold out of a fridge. Sleep in a bed, things like this. And yes, still, I appreciate our civilizated behaviour. Still, I seem to need it because it’s always around us. With the cars, the caravans, the houses, the hotels, the restaurants, the bars. Everywhere.

It’s there and unreachable. It’s not our current world, it’s another. We’re out of it so we behave more as strangers of society than as foreigners on a travel. It isn’t important from which country we come, but the people can see that we look different. That we’re more dirty, maybe that we smell, I don’t know what else. I just think of my hair…

We have to try to float through all this. We are the river.

In some hours, we will be on the bikes again, heading towards Nîmes and looking for a camping. The first one since we left Spain.

But where to go afterwards? Send me a message to my mobile, because we have the choice: Through Arles to Marseille and than back over Avignon or to the Pont du Gare, one of the most famous tourist attractions here in France.

I’d like to see the Mediterranean again, but I don’t like to go one way twice. We could save about 100 km. But we won’t meet with Adam in this case. All is so wicked and I don’t find a solution.

And this insecurity always. In every minute. But we have to go on, that’s all. Are we fast enough? Can we afford to go to Marseille?
We will see where we end up. After the last day, I need a short brake. I need to rest a little, my mind and my body in the same way. You cannot hurry all the time, I’m sick of it.

Sometimes, I just want to take some pictures of the landscape, for example, but Alex is there, or even if he’s not, I cannot stop, because it’s hard to gain the same speed again. But I keep the pictures in my head, they become part of myself, they are the literature I read every day.
I have nothingelse.

At nights, it’s usually dark and at days you have to rest, to eat, to talk. There are almost no possibilities to read for me. It needs some steps to do and I don’t have the time to go this way. Hehe. Maybe I should find another one and just start reading instead of doing nothing while waiting for something to happen. (i.e. when Alex is in a supermarket and I secure the bikes.)

But for now, you have to wait. My father is online and we’re going to talk a bit.

Stay tuned! (And don’t forget to write, pleeeaaasssee.)


One Comment

  1. Anja
    4. August 2005

    sounds like somebody is kind of fed up with his situation,
    maybe not in general but with most parts. well I´m sure
    you both will make your way back wherever you´d like to go
    and in a few months you´ll think : what a great journey we made, places we saw, people we met, obstacles we´ve
    overcome and things we laughed about!

    Have a safe trip and take as much out of it as you can!
    Big Kiss to Alex!
    Big Hug to Jon!

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